How old is your mom Dead

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Did you know that I can't talk any louder than this... Exept when I can

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I slipped you some roofies You'll be out in a few

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sometimes i put my hands on the floor tuck my head into my cheat and lean forward... because thats how i roll

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar she took the back seat

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Why does the groom wear a black tux? Because he knows a funeral when he sees one.

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what's funnier then 33? actually there's a plenty of things, just have to think about it

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A gay man walks out of his bedroom, rubbing his ass in pain. He says, "I hate it when I slip and fall in the shower."

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A young child drops his ice cream and began to cry. Why are you crying asks his mother Because I dropped my ice cream said the child

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A woman walks into a bar She is raped.

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A boy asked his dad Why are Chinese eyes like that. His dad replied there concentrating that's why there so smart The boy went up to a student in his class and said look I'm like you The teacher asked who told him that he said his dad The dad was called up by the school when the teacher told him what his son did he went GOOZILLA His wife asked him what he was up to and he said farting on her face when she was a sleep 3 days later he found out his wife was cheating on him he knocked on the door only to realize he was on drugs and that he never had a family.

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What sound does a childs head make in a vice? I don't know, I was too busy wanking.

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Q: How many dwarfs does it take to change a light bulb? A: 1 or 2. One to change the light bulb and maybe another one to guards the staircase for the safety of the first one when the ceiling is too high (Wich happens almost every time because they are dwarfs.)

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If you play a Justin Bieber album backwards, I swear you can hear satanic messages... but even worse, if you play it forward, you hear Justin Bieber.

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What's black, white, and red all over? Half of a dalmatian.

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What do 2 arabs say to each other in a super-market? For those of you who don't know your history, the true Lebanese are Phonecians. As such, they are not Ishmaelites/Arabs. They are from the house of Jaffeth. the youngest of Noah's sons. Arabs are from the house of Shem (i.e., Shemites/Semites), the oldest of Noah's sons, and Hamm, Noah's middle son who fathered Cannah with his mother. Haggar, the woman with whom Abraham fathered Ishmael, was a Cannonite. As such, Ishmael, the father of the Arabs, is half Semetic and half Hammetic. The true Lebanese are neither. Furthermore, the first non-Jewish Christian church was established with the Gentiles (the children of Jaffeth) in Lebanon. And then the shop blew up.

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Why is Osama Bin Laden scared of the dark? To be honest, I don't know, and I doubt you do either. Osama Bin Laden has been a fugitive on America's Top Ten Most Wanted list for over 10 years; there is no way that you could possibly know such personal information about him if the United States government can't even locate him and prosecute him for the heinous crimes he committed against the U.S. Don't ever lie to me again.

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A man walked into this bar, and said ouch.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names.

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a chicken An animal cruelty charge

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What's black, white and red all over? Half a penguin.

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Why did the rapist go to the girl's dorm? He wanted to apologise for his crimes, and brought them all a drink. It was spiked, he raped them

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Knock Knock, Who's There? The The Who? YYYYEEEEEEAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!!!!

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Hello.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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