A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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Why did the black man smell really bad? A: becuase he ran out of paper

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What's the difference between a Corvette and a sack of dead babies? I don't have a Corvette in my garage.

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So, a man walks into a bar, and he ends up in intensive care, because the bar was very hot and gave him severe burns. He was on business in an industrial park.

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why did Samantha fall off the building? She was hit by a flying fridge dropped by a traffic helicopter.

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What do you call a blue penquin dipped in chocolate doing the samba? A blue penquin dipped in chocolate doing the samba!

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A: you have a strong arm. B: yea i work ou- A: you can master bate a whale.

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do you no what im doing? writing this joke.

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why did dominic buy a new speaker on holiday because his parents died and his was at home

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Why was the girl crying? DEEZ NUTS!

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What did the man say to the other man? Hi

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What do I do with all the wheelchairs after I boil all the vegetables?

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What did the blonde say when she found a dead bird on the sidewalk? "Aww, look at the poor dead bird!"

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Did you hear the one about the chicken crossing the road? It wanted to go to the other side.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A bug in your nut.

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why was the frog sad..... because it had a science lesson with the year 10s about the insides of animals

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Why don't elderly people act their age? because they die.

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Your mother is average.

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the batmobile? Robin, get in the batmobile

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Guy finds lamp in the desert and rubs it three times. No genie appears because there's no such thing as magic.

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Why did the ship crash into Italy? Because a woman took over driving it!

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What did the homicidal maniac say to his 13th victim? Nothing, she was dead at the time.

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"What's uhhh.". "Crap I forget" "Oh yeah! 32!"

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A. Do you know the best part about Anti Jokes? B. No

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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