What's worse than HIV? AIDS -Bob Bobby

thumb_up thumb_down -44

The frightened girl did everything the man said. " Open your legs. Bend over..." She was playing Simon says and was afraid to loose. It wasn't rape, which her sister had experienced while traveling in 2007.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Hey! That's mine! Give it back!

thumb_up thumb_down -44

How are cars made? By magic.

thumb_up thumb_down -44

Cleavlin has a shmaaala dik

thumb_up thumb_down -46

Where is the center of the universe? There is no center of the universe! According to the standard theories of cosmology, the universe started with a "Big Bang" about 14 thousand million years ago and has been expanding ever since. Yet there is no center to the expansion; it is the same everywhere. The Big Bang should not be visualised as an ordinary explosion. The universe is not expanding out from a center into space; rather, the whole universe is expanding and it is doing so equally at all places, as far as we can tell. In 1929 Edwin Hubble announced that he had measured the speed of galaxies at different distances from us, and had discovered that the farther they were, the faster they were receding. This might suggest that we are at the center of the expanding universe, but in fact if the universe is expanding uniformly according to Hubble's law, then it will appear to do so from any vantage point. If we see a galaxy B receding from us at 10,000 km/s, an alien in galaxy B will see our galaxy A receding from it at 10,000 km/s in the opposite direction. Another galaxy C twice as far away in the same direction as B will be seen by us as receding at 20,000 km/s. The alien will see it receding at 10,000 km/s:

thumb_up thumb_down -46

How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, a dead baby is a horrible sight and shouldn't be laughed at.

thumb_up thumb_down -46

What has four wheels, two wings, and flies? A bird...I was kidding about the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -48

The Minnesota Vikings won a game.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Why did the chicken cross the road? it doesn't matter, it got turned into KFC before it crossed.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

A man sits down to dinner with his wife And she notifies him that their 8 year old son just died

thumb_up thumb_down -50

How do you make someone stop talking? Shove a rock down their throat.

thumb_up thumb_down -52

yo mama is fat shes fat

thumb_up thumb_down -64

Why did the chicken cross the road?? Because he felt like it okay!!! Just let him be!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -66

A man ordered tomato and basil, but received tomato with a man. the man's name is Basil!

thumb_up thumb_down -86

Yo mamma's so fat, she's self-concsious about her weight and is embarassed when people make fun of her weight which makes her escape to her only friend, food, which makes her even fatter, so she will never lose weight until society accepts her and is not so prejudice towards overweight people.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

A horse walks into a bar. He was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

What's worse than missing your favorite TV show? 9/11.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

Why did so many white people vote for obama? They strongly believed in what he had to say, and believed he was the right person to lead our country during its troubled times.

thumb_up thumb_down +55

So snoop dog drank some milk! :)

thumb_up thumb_down +51

Why was Sally crying She got a high five In the face With a chair

thumb_up thumb_down +51

What did John the accountant do when he saw a flying dog, He woke up from a wonderful dream and started his day

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Why didn't the woman believe in God? Her own personal beliefs.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Whats an Anti Joke

thumb_up thumb_down +47

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops