You are the most beautiful person in the world.

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Some Minions have one eye, others have two. And nobody seems to care.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? An astronaut. He's all alone in the vacuum of space. No one hears him knocking.

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Yo' momma so fat she buys clothingthat is bigger than most other people's clothing

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Your social life.

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what taste like an apple, looks like an apple, but isnt an apple? an apple.

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what's worse than fining out that the best and worst jokes on anti-joke.com are about the Holocaust The Holocaust

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A black man is a human, with feelings, living cells and a loving and devoted family, while a park bench is made from wood and metal and used purely for people to sit on. In parks.

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Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete fell off. Who was left? Repeat. Yeah.

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do you have a pen i can borrow? yeah, here.

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Whats worse than getting broken into by a robber? Looking at Obama

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What do you call 6 white men on a bench? The NBA

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A coach walks into the team dressing room at halftime; his team is down 42-0. He screams at the players, "You guys are playing like a bunch of grannies. No offense"

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Q: A vandal walked into a bar. What did the bartender say? A: Nothing, the vandal had covered him and the bar in pritt stick before he had the opportunity to speak, then left with his penguin accomplice, Reginald the third.

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Friends are like potatoes. I don't have any potatoes.

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A blonde walks into a bar. Shes now in a coma.

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What is a five letter word that sounds just like trucks? Vroom

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Why did the man stop going to his local doctor? Because they put highly poisen liquids in the shots

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A Jewish person was found dead in an alley way last night, Hitler did nothing wrong.

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Here isa poem from a dog Roses are gray violets are a different shade of gray Let's go chase cars

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every time I stay in the water too long my pp gets all shriverly sometimes can't find it omg that's so weird

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this is not a joke. jks

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What to you call a heavy person, Someone overweight

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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