What did Annie the Orphan get for Christmas? News that her parents are dead.

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This is not a joke

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Why can't Larry drive? Larry's a rock.

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What did the finger say to the thumb? I'm in glove with you.

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scenario: retarded monkey upside down in a mirror question: why is jims dad fat answer: the mexican chicken is an aperadus

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why did the two girls fight? Because they were mad at eachother.

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why does horse head huffer keep posting here? because he really doesn't understand the concept.

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Other Guy: What are you looking at? Me: You.

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Roses are red Violets are violet Don't know why people are saying they're blue

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A boy wakes up in the morning and says i"'m feeling kind of fishy today," the boy's dad walks in and relpies "that's because you are a fish."

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What did I say to my mum this morning? Good morning.

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why did the girl go into the kitcen? she was preparing a meal for her well safisticated family which had not ate dinner yet that day.

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Roses are Red Violets are blue You little stupid ass bitch I ain't fucking with you

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Why was Mrs. Clause mad at Santa Clause? Because he was hanging out with three hoes, Ho, Ho, and Ho

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What would you do for a Klondike Bar? I would probably spend somewhere under 3 dollars at a store, but only if somebody else drives me. I really don't want to drive, not in this gas shortage. You know what...forget it, Klondike Bars make my teeth hurt due to my sensitive teeth problem. I know I should get that sensitive teeth tooth paste, but I always forget when at the store.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it can do whatever the hell it wants

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I'M JOSH BROWN!!!!!

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Your mom is so fat that she enjoys junk food regularly.

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whats worse than a worm in your apple? the holocaust whats worse than the holocaust? two worms in your apple

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How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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Why did Susie drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock-knock. Who's there? Not Susie.????

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Bees inside of your eyeballs.

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What's the difference between a Watermelon and a baby? One is fun to smash with a sledgehammer, the other is a watermelon.

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A blind 1st grader is doing math. He can't figure out a problem so he asks his mom to help, his mom then ask "Why don't you just count by your fingers?" the little boy then said "MOM! I'm blind I can't see!" his mom replys "then how do you see your homework?" the boys replys "I opened my eyes, now help me"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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