So a mouse walks into a bar....the bartender immediatly kills it because he doesn't want another C rating by the sanitation department.

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What did casino dealer say to the other? Every day I'm shuffling.

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whats brown and sticky? a sweaty mexican

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During english, we started talking about Attention Deficit Disorder when... OOOOOOOOOHHHHHH SHINY... wait what were we talking about

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Some really old band covered Dirty Bit. But the cut out the Dirty Bit part so its just the Time of life part

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A father of four joins the military. He returns home after his service.

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What's the difference bettween the holocaust and a bee, 6 million jews died during the holocaust. Bees make honey.

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All this fuss about drink driving is a load of crap! I frequently drink and drive, and I've never had an accident, apart from one small collision in which my wife was paralysed from the neck down.

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Add William Wright On Facebook Answer- www.facebook.com/public/William-Wright

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why did the plant eat a banana? it was hungry

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Yeah I was beginning to enjoy that as well, but I used "timed hypnosis" I have not seen it been coined elsewhere yet, not that I learn hypnosis anymore, I kinda teach it covertly to whoever I believe can use it responsively. "Timed hypnosis" is not really based upon a set amount of time after all time is relative, and our subconcious does know that and the subconcius understands that we did not invent time just because we made some fucking dials spin around" Now, timed hypnosis is based on a purpose, for example: "I will go into a trance until I am done teaching my new buddy how covert hypnosis works and teach her to use it subconciously" But now I made you aware of that, so you can use it consciously as well, the real magic here is that the subconcious is so much more efficient and powerful than the conscious mind that it would not even be neccesary to have a concious mind, except for one thing.

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Yo' mama's such a hoe she got arrested last week for prostitution charges!

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- Knock knock - Who's there - James - James who ? - James Redwood.

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What's funny? A joke. What's funnier than a joke? Two jokes.

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Johnny is walking around school when he sees a kid crying. He asked the kid what he was crying about and the kid said " I was trying to talk to a girl"

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Extra extra read all about it dunkin donuts has now been named dunkin pigs..a cops favorite hang out.

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Knock knock Who's there A girl scout A girl scout who? A girl scout trying to sell cookies to support her alcoholic parents who beat her

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knock, knok who's there? ya ya who? yahoo

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What do you have when you take the gun, badge and uniform away from a cop? A man in his underwear.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Postman Will you sign hear please he said Oh my toaster came

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What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff!

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? the bear got shot

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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what do u call a kid with autism? a autistic s.o.b or Hennon bart

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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