Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He had no arms.

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A: you have a strong arm. B: yea i work ou- A: you can master bate a whale.

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Your mother is so fat that if she were to fall from a great distance she would hit the ground with more force than that of an average sized individual.

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I'm a necrophiliac. Keep watch over your dead friends... ;)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He had to get to the other side.

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Why was the boy upset? His penis fell off and his mom was making him go to the library.

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Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A.One's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, and the other's a human.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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What do you get if you mix a Bulldog and a Shih tzu? A new breed of dog.

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Did you hear about Helen Keller's dog? Neither did she.

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Ten black people are on the 100th floor of a 110 floor building. They are going to die because they are trapped in the World Trade Center and are leaving a very happy life with their loving families.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got ran over by a car

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Did you hear about the kid-napping in Minnesota? He woke up

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bryden is a faggot

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EGGPLANT

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Roses are red Violets are blue Peas are green Plums are purple Thieves are black

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What is something you would not normally find in a china cabinet? Japan

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what is a present you would give a werewolves? I said... OBAMA!!! tee hee

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One fish... Two fish... Red fish... I have AIDs

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roses are red violets should be purple

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Bob:Know who's really stupid? Rick:Who? Bob:Your mum.

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A woman walks into the kitchen to make a sandwich because she is hungry and she likes sandwiches.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops