Have you heard the one about the monkey who jumped off the roof? Neither have I.

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Bob: Hey, hey Jim Jim: Yeah? Bob: Remember me. Jim: ...okay?? Bob: Knock knock Jim: Who's there? Bob: I THOUGHT YOU WERE GONNA FRICKIN REMEMBER ME!!!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cher. Cher who? Just Cher.

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2 guys walk into a bar the third one ducked

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How do you kill a blonde? You stab her.

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The biggest lie in the world . . . I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Two Jews walk into a bar. They have a lengthy discussion regarding the hardships their people have suffered throughout history. Eventually, the subject changes to which coffee franchise has the best blend. A clear, concise decision is never reached. They then are asked to leave the bar, as they have not ordered any drinks and the bar is for paying customers only.

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No this is Patrick, I'm not a krusty krab

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what's a self-driving car 10 years from now? probably just "a car".

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what do u get when two cars collide... a bunch of mexican

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Whats blue, flies with wings, weights over two tons, and has a rocket engine with six eyeballs? *hayball rolls* Moral: Im the one asking you...

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whats worse than being raped by a random stranger getting raped by your uncle

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Did you hear about the guy that dropped the soap in prison? He apparently gripped it a bit too tightly causing it to slip out of his hands, but managed to pick it up promptly and finish showering with no further incidence.

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roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweat and so are you

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24

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A man walks into a bar. His alcohol dependency is killing is family.

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Person: kk Person1: did you just kk me? Person: no

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Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A Mexican is a Mexican and a bench is a bench.

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what do you call a girl with no arms and legs whatever her name is

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What's worse than getting raped? Getting anal raped twice

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Q: Whats black and hangs from a tree???? A: A tire!!!!!!!!!!!

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Why was the boy crying? Because he had AIDS

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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