How do you say vampire in spanish? Vampiro.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, so is my face, I'm constipated

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why did bob hit Jim Because bob didn't like Jim

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Why are you on anti joke? Because your not funny enough to make your own jokes

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What's worse than people reposting the same joke all the time? The holocaust.

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What is the difference between apple and android? Apple makes fruit and android candy

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What's the difference between a poodle and a noodle? Scaboodle!

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whats one plus one penis

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MAGHBERRY !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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why did the chicken cross the road because the farm is across the street from were it is now

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I didn't choose the thug life... I got a job.

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Z.

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Why did the fish cross the road? Because fish don't have legs and can't walk anywhere

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The more I learn to understand myself, the more true I am towards my values the less human I feel. The irony is, that there will always be other humans feelng the same.

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Q: Why doesn't the young lady speak very much? A: Because she's a whore

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? Steve

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A man walked into a bar Ouch.

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What sound does a childs head make in a vice? I don't know, I was too busy wanking.

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What's brown and ryhmes with snoop? Dr. Dre

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The scientists of Cambridge have finally developed a cure for feeling low! They have presented it in the style of a song. See if you can spot the hidden frequency wavelengths when you sing it out lout. They are what make you feel better. You've got to LOVE the world! Be a friend! And when You're down you've got to get up again! And when your blue, here's what you do. Just sing this happy tune! However if that fails, then you should consider getting professional help.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck on the way.

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how do you make time fly? throw a clock out a window.

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A kangaroo walks into a bar and says "Lipstick is the blood of all wounds." The bartender does not know how the kangaroo said this or why.

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A: When was rhe last time you touched yourself? B: A few seconds ago when I had an itch on my arm

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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