How Many R's are in Terrence? two, how could there be 6?

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why did the chicken cross the road? it didnt it got hit by a bus.

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Q What did the Whale say to the Giraffe? A Why are you in the ocean?

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What did the heart surgeon say to the brain surgeon? We are both surgeons

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What happens when you cross a starfish with a dog? Dogs and chickens are from a different phylum, they are genetically incompatible.

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What do you call a dog with 4 legs? A dog.

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hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

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(To the tune of Perry the Platypus) He's a completely retarded Allosaurus of action! A purple dopey dimwit who always giggles away! He never does anything But children's songs he does sing And the little kids squeal whenever they hear him say... *i love you, you love me* He's Barney! Barney the Dinosaur!

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Roses are red, Stones are grey, This poem is obvious, You don't say??

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Q:How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? A:Depends on the volume of said tub.

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You are so ugly that when u were born, your mom was unable to breast-feed you because she would have to look at your face to do so.

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Q:What do you say to an albino man that will always get his attention? A:His name.

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One day a man woke up and decided that he was going to do something with his life. He then got a haircut, took a shower and bought a nice new suit. After that he went home and cleaned up his whole house and invited his parents, that were not very close with him, over for dinner.An hour and thirty minutes before his parents got there, he went to the store to pick up some food to prepare for the very important dinner. On the way home he see's a homeless man walking on the side of the road. The man felt bad for him because he was poor so he gave him $10. He then proceeded home to make the dinner. The dinner turned out very well and he went to bed a better man.

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-my friend Cassie is coming over - oh is she cute? -yea but she's not my type -oh that's understandable then

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ?... because he was dead

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once there where 3 guys on a beach. they found a bottle and a fetis came out.. later they found out 2 of the 3 had cancer and the 3rd was a vegetable.

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar and gets shot.

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What's worse than no christmas? Taking a chainsaw to the face.

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doctor,doctor my eyesight is getting worse, you are certainly right, this is the post office

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like this if you think what ever you want to..

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God said onto john "come forth and receive eternal life" john came fifth and received a toaster.

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A student exclaimed "This test is a piece of cake!" He ate it.

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A horse walks into a bar, but is kicked out because animals are not allowed in that bar.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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