there once was a time before bonerss it sucked it sucked real bad like that kid who never washes his gym closes bad Mason Manning JLR

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How do you stop your child from picking his nose? Cut his hands off

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How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the bird fall down? It got shot.

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One day a man was out fishing in the lake. Suddenly, there was a huge fish pulling his fishing pole so hard it almost broke. Luckily, he managed to pull the fish into his boat. It was the biggest fish he had ever caught and he brought it home for his family to see. They were all very proud.

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once you go black you prefer not to date any white people

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Why didn't the black man eat a packet of crisps? Because he didn't have any.

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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What do you call a midget on the moon? A midget.

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Why did Sally flunk math? Because she didn't achieve the passing grade which is 60 percent or greater. She might need some tutoring in order to master the concept of the lessons to which she has difficulty solving.

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What did the comedian tell the audience? A well thought out joke that anyone can relate to because that is what the point of a joke is.

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A man goes into a bar. What are mangos doing in a bar?

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A kid has no friends.

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Gay Rights

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homework

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You have now entered Automatic Breathing Mode

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How many dead babies can you fit in my car? None, I don't allow anyone to put dead babies in my car.

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What did Kim Kardashian say when she got a breast implant? DERP!

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Why couldn't Mike answer the phone on time? On his way to the phone he was shot and killed.

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Who likes to be fisted? Sock puppets.

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How do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family.

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What do you call a magic owl? HOODINI only some will get it...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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