When you cross a bird on the sidewalk what do you do??? Run in big circles.

why was there a fish in a fish tank ? because if it wasnt it would die

What do you get when you cross a chicken with an alligator? Go take some acid and find out for yourself

Do you like fish-sticks? Love 'em. You like putting fish-sticks in your mouth? Yeah. What are you, a gay fish?

Why wasn't the Asian at work? Because the sweat shop was closed on Sundays...

What's so sad about a bus with mentally handicapped children falling off a cliff? There was one empty seat.

Again, what is it called when you are safely inside at winter your power is out, but the streets are full of people as the weather gets really bad and people start bouncing around? Blizzard Entertainment. What is it called when a robot lets out gas? Electronic fArts.

How are cars made? By magic.

what did the crocodile say to the fish? OMNOMNOMNOMNOM!! and then the fish swam away because of the the weird noise the crock was making...

Nature is filled with wondrous things. No really, this isn't a joke.

wht does a blonde do with a box of crayons? eat a taco.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing set? She has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

Why are black people so good at basketball? They practice.

A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

How do you drop a raw egg on to the floor without cracking it? Any way you want, it is very hard to crack concrete.

Why Stevie is silent nowdays? Because he's dead.

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

Why black guys are the fasttest runners? Because the slowers are already in prison

How do you seat four gay guys at a bar when there's only one stool? Flip the stool over.

The Game

Where can you find a good lawyer? At a reputable law firm.

Did you hear about the man who discovered the secret to making women happy? Neither have I.

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle

A black van approaches a small boy. The boy gets in the van, and the van drives away.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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