Hellen Keller walks into a bar. Well, at least she thinks she did.

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What's the difference between a rabbit and a Rabbi? Rabbits are of the family Leporidea, whereas Rabbi's are Jewish.

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yo mamas so fat whenever she wears a pink bathing suit people say "look at that fat lady wearing a pink bathing suit!

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How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender. How do you get them out? Well you shouldn't. Leave the car in front of somebody that you hate's house.

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A doctor walks into a bar. It's his day off and decides to celebrate after a long week of working.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is dead, and thereby lacks the necessary motor control.

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What do you call a car with a sunroof? A car.

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Your mammas so fat, she weighs significantly more than the average person.

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Why did the kid have no arms? A clown came and chopped them off.

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Guns don't kill people; high speed bullets and sharp projectiles launched at high speeds usually inflict painful and possibly fatal wounds that may kill someone. That someone loves and is loved by others.

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why did the chicken cross the road? no one knows because it got hit by a bus.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, speaking to a bird would have been considered highly irregular, bordering on insane. He left the bird alone, until the time came to slaughter the bird and take it's nutritious meat.

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I was so fat I went on a diet

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Q. What did the buddhist monk say to the hotdog vendor? A. "I'd like a hotdog, please."

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How did the young child react when a bullet went through his head? He fell to the ground and his heart stopped beating.

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Did you hear about the sick juggler? Turns out he had cancer on his brain tumour.

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"Oren" Tifa is not around here, besides she does not like you anymore, get lost you wacko!

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Once upon the time.... It was 12 o´clock

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait; it would be quite unsanitary to talk about my genitals in front of you.

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What do you call it when a black man and a Mexican open up a fast-food restaurant together? A joint venture.

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why was sally bleeding? they never buy band-aids over her nubs.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks him, "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply, because horses cannot talk.

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Kids are cheering about the confetti at a birthday party, the mom says the twin towers just collapsed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops