What do you call a man in a pool with no arms and legs? Bob

why did the lady fall out the window? someone threw axe at her

What do you call a rollercoaster without a coaster? A roller

9/11 jokes are just plane wrong

What did the white guy say to the black guy? What's up?

Holy crap it's a talking muffin!

And love is, bein' the owner of a company that makes rape whistles and even though you started the company with good intentions trying to reduce the rate of rape, now you don't wanna reduce it at all cuz if the rape rate declines you'll see an equal decline in whistle sales. Without rapists, who's gonna buy your whistles? Who's gonna buy your whistles? Love is all about whistles.

What do you get if you mix a Bulldog and a Shih tzu? A new breed of dog.

Fucked up quotes: "When walking trough hell, keep going!" (I just turn back and walk the other way thank you, I mean worst case I walk trough heaven right?" "Never give up, ever ever ever ever ever..." (Ill just end it with etc because I gave up something as hard as... Typing?) "Curiosity killed the cat" (Translated: "Curiosity kills, stay inside forever" What?)

What's more depressing than watching a worm watching to worms

what do you call an elevator full of white people. a box of crackers

Make a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day... set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

An Atheist sneezed. Everyone around him said, "God bless you." He thanked them and continued on with his day.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

What did the disabled boy get on Christmas morning? Cancer.

Why did the clown go to jail? For 23 charges of rape and murder.

Two children decide to bury a time capsule in their backyard and open it 5 years later. They then break into tears realizing they have no backyard because they are orphans. They are now orange.

What do you call a puppy with one eye, one ear, and one leg? An ugly mother f*cker.

Knock knock! Who's there? The doorbell wasn't working.

What would Michael Jackson do if he were in a room full of kids? Nothing, he's dead.

When you hit an animal Realize your out of your mind Then realize the animals mind is over there in the ditch.

a horse walks into a blender ow

A spaceship enters a black hole. A spaceship enters a black hole. A spaceship enters a black hole.

why did the black man get kicked out of the hospital? nothing was wrong with him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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