What's sad about an elderly couple who has had a long, fruitful marriage? Nothing.

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What's five times 10? Sixty, you retarded fuck.

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How did the black kid apply for college? The Common App. Duhh

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Roses are red Babies cry Get in my bed Or you will dies

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Someone else's.

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John and Sarah sitting in a tree. K i s s i n g. First comes love. Oops theres goes john-- he's falling---he's falling... he's broken his neck and ruptured his internal organs. D e a t h

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What is worse than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Obama

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Alice? Childhood Alice? I did not recognize you! Its so nice to hear from you again! I would not worry too much about Nero`s shouting at night dear friend, while he has overcome a lot, he suffers from nightmares and nightterrors, its not pain, not physical at least, please do not tell him I told you, he prefers sparing people the details. Should I type as If I am typing to Nero? Sorry, I am just a bit flustered, Nero has never been the romantic type, not towards me at least... I know the "official chatting hours are over, but can I ask you or rather him to stay on a bit longer?"

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What did the blind man say to his best friend? All i see is darkness and i want to end my life

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What's worse than hell? I would say the Holocaust, but they're both the same for the Jews.

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If life throws you melons, maybe you are hitting the melons.

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I like playing in the balls. I like balls.

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Why cant Sally brush her hair? Because she has leukaemia.

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why did billy fall down? Because he is mentaly retarted and was just plain stupid.

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Why did the jewish plumber commit suicide? After years abuse from his alcoholic father and rich sibling, he finally snapped and killed himself on his birthday after nobody told him happy birthday.

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Two fish are in a tank. The first one says, "How the heck do I drive this thing!".

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Im taking a shit right now.

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A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

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what do you call a man with blue eyes??? a man with blue eyes

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What do you get when you put a goat and an owl together? A goat and an owl

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antijoke is the best website.

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whats the difference between black people and dogs? people actually care when something happens to a dog

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Roses are red pineapple is yellow I'll shove your head up my ass so you can eat some marshmallows!

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Why did the frog cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops