Why did the chicken crossed yo mama? Because your moms a man and your birth certificate was an apology letter from the condom factory.

I had sex with your mom. It was f*cking terrible.

What did the walrus say to the Penguin. It said MAHHRGH. because walruses can't really talk

How to apply total justice 1: Kill all humans! Moral: "Why do I have to die while he gets to live? Nobody gets to live? Sounds fair and just to me!"

Why did Steve put his trumpet in the fridge? He had begun the early stages of dementia and was becoming increasingly confused and detached from reality. Also he was German.

How did the chicken know where he was going? He had a map.

Sarah Palin

Whats black and blue and red all over? An infant after its been beaten with a bat.

What do you get when you cross Justin Bieber with a chicken? Most likely some kind of singing human-chicken monster, although given the little research done on cross-species splicing, this is a highly improbable circumstance.

What looks like a chair but isn't? A picture of a chair.

What's better than having sex with your mother? Nothing. I'm in love with her, son.

"Hey, why won't you let me through?" "These tickets are fake." "No they aren't. LOOK OVER THERE!" The guard turns around, and then turns back. Minorly inconvenienced, he arrests the man immediately, upon which he is sent to jail and anally raped multiple times.

What do you call a lazy good-for-nothing who can't succed at anything, steals your money, and who is unskilled in every way? A women

A tree falls in the woods. A deaf boy, who had been frolicking through the forest, is struck down by the tree. He dies. His parents are ridden with grief for years, until finally the father commits suicide. The mother soon remarried and had two more children. Both died before the age of 15. She was a horrible mother.

what'd one jew say to the other jew? i cant eat this its ham. (sounds better when said with disappointed jew voice)

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Apparently he can walk now.

How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

drugs.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares what a Chicken does?

Do you want to hear a joke?!?!?!?!?!?! A happy orphan

Q:What did the scissors say to the paper? A: Nothing, cause thier scissors and paper they don't talk..

What did Jennifer get in her college exam? She got a C minus

Q: What do you get when you stand a blonde on her head? A: HORSE DICK

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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