A flea walks into a bar. Nobody notices because it is a very small insect

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone dropped a refrigerator on her. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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how do you kill Lady Gaga? with a gun.

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What's brown, smells like shit, and are annoying as hell? Taking shits

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What happened to the guy that got hit by a bus. He died

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Q:What's the difference between my refrigerator and the trunk of my car? A: There isn't a spare tire in my refrigerator.

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Why was Tigger looking in the toilet? He was looking for pooh

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Q: why does the fire breather hate his job A: his parents were burned to death MR

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How does a black man put puzzles together? First, he locates the four corners. Next, he begins filling in the sides. Finally, he uses the picture on the box to fill in the center. It can be a very tedious process if he is not paying attention.

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What do you call a Chinese person with a computer for a head? Dead because it is impossible for your heart to function with out a brain

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Milkman. Milkman who? I've been coming here for 14 years and you don't even know my name? I helped take your mother to the hospital for crying out loud! I held you in my arms as a baby! And you don't even have the decency to remember MY NAME?! I'm sorry I don't live in a house that allows milk and other groceries to be delivered, I'm sorry that I wasn't born into a nice family with a nice home! I'm sorry that I have had to come here EVERY WEEK FOR FOURTEEN YEARS and you can't even remember my NAME! My name! I left my family for christmas one year to go pick up that elmo doll for you when you were a kid! I saved you from that burning treehouse! I helped you with you're 3rd grade science fair project and you won! YOU WON! We took a picture together that i have kept in my wallet. And i proudly say here's me and timmy. ME AND TIMMY! TIMMY! But no...you don't need to know my name. Well good day sir. You shan't see me again.

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Laugh

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Two friends sit down to dinner, the third is late so they eat him

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Kyle is consistently sexually harassed by a woman while at work. Everything is fine.

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Why did the chicken was the boat see the genie yes but dog said meow? Last night when you were sleeping, I took a dump in your shoes and used your toothbrush to wipe my butt. Then I took your wallet and flushed down the toilet.

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Why was the 2-year-old girl found dead in the swamp? Her mom was Casey Anthony.

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Why couldn't Sally climb up the ladder? Because she was a paraplegic.

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Adam Sandler is still funny ! *cough*

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What does an emu an a kiwi have in common? Both are flightless birds endemic to there own countries.

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Ask me if I'm a toaster Are you a toaster? No, I'm a tree.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse says "I have Cancer."

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Your Mother

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Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

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Colby Michael Schluter

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops