Q: How Do You Stop a Bus? A: Pull the Brakes so it comes to a absolute stop.

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Why is my son so unhappy? Because I beat his mother violently in front of him

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Q: What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench A: The NBA

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Why are there so many black men in the NBA? Because they trained hard and practiced regularly to get there..

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Why did the old man get wet even though he was using an umbrella? Because it didn't save from falling off the bridge.

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why did the goat go up the ladder? because its ladder goat

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Peaches eat leaches, that is why sneaches live on beaches.

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What's big, grey, and can't climb a tree? A car park.

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Knock Knock. In about 10 seconds you'll be trespassing on my property, I suggest you leave immediately. Your suppose to say who's there.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was ran over before it made it to the other side.

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

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Pete and repeat were on a boat. Repeat fell off, who was left?

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car

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(joker) Do you like fishsticks? (recipient) "No" (any response from the joker at this point qualifies as anti joke)

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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YOUR MUM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What was the first thing that went through the mind of the first 9/11 jumper? Thank god I only jumped from the first floor.

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What did the robet say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. Its funny becuase the robot had no arms.

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roses are red violets are blue , but i would't know that because u never bring me flowers, you bastard .

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What do you call a mulsim that tattles on you for vandilising muslim propaganda Target Practice

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What's the difference between Jews and Germans? Jews are allowed to have an opinion about the Holocaust and hoot and holler and threaten anyone who has a different opinion than they. The sad, anti-joke part of this is that most morons will actually support this tyrannical bullying behavior. Also, special taxes against Germans that they're not allowed to have a problem with. I guess slavery is okay if you're White.

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what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

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Why was Sally's dad crying? Because Sally got raped. Why was Sally crying? Her dad raped her.

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Roses are Red. Violets are Blue. Faces like yours belong in the Zoo. Don't be mad I will be there too. Not in the gate but laughing at you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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