Knock knock Go fuck yourself

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How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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What is more worse than death? Death

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Q: Why did the Unicorn cross the road? A: It didn't Unicorns are fictional creatures.

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Did you know that I can't talk any louder than this... Exept when I can

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What do you call a lazy good-for-nothing who can't succed at anything, steals your money, and who is unskilled in every way? A women

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I asked a Jewish girl for her number, so she rolled up her sleve

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A man walks into a bar.

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A tree falls in the woods. A deaf boy, who had been frolicking through the forest, is struck down by the tree. He dies. His parents are ridden with grief for years, until finally the father commits suicide. The mother soon remarried and had two more children. Both died before the age of 15. She was a horrible mother.

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Q: how do you stop a blonde woman from drowning? A: unplug the stopper in the bathtub Q: how do you stop a baby from drowning? A: take your foot off its head

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What's a pirates favorite element the periodic table? Gold.

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Why does it take women to cum slower than men? Who cares

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if a tree falls in the forest does it make a sound? if a tree falls in the forest and it falls on a mime, does anyone care?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I wouldn't consider Mark a chicken. In fact, given the high speed and volume of cars traversing that particular road in both directions, I'd say it was a ballsy move. In hindsight, though, he probably should have waited for the "walk" symbol to appear for pedestrians, in order to avoid being run over by a bus. Anyway, if Pastor John would like to say a few words before we finally put Mark's body to rest...

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what did the therapist say to the other therapist? WE'VE SAID THIS WAY TOO MANY TIMES YOU SHIT

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Q:What did the scissors say to the paper? A: Nothing, cause thier scissors and paper they don't talk..

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A African American male and a Mexican male are both in a car, who is driving? Most likely the owner or the car.

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what did the stop sign say to the car? nothing.

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What do gay guys eat? Normal food like every other human being.

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I went to the doctors the other day for a check up and the doctors says to me "sorry your going to have to stop wanking" and I say to him " what! Why?" and the doctor says "I'm trying to examine you".

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Knock Knock. Who's there? What's up. What's up who? The sky.

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I slipped and fell in the shower today. Good thing my dad caught me

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The only thing you need to call a woman that starts with "B" is "Beautiful" Biitches love to be called beautiful

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at it's face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops