Last Christmas I gave you my pie but the very next day you put it in your tummay. Now your dead because I poisoned the pie.

Smell your breath Coamhin you smelly cunt

what do you call a blonde with black hair? Artificial intelligence

what did Sandra bullock say to Jesse James? I hate your fickin a**!!:)

a horse nibbled a baby

[Insert hurtful, yet spontaneous comment here.]

What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

fava beans

Knock knock Who's there? A robber Oh

Why did the black guy scream? well, he just saw his friend get shot, and there was blood everywhere.

What did the comedian tell the audience? A well thought out joke that anyone can relate to because that is what the point of a joke is.

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

Your mom is so fat that she enjoys junk food regularly.

the love boat

How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? Physical abuse.

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, your wife and kids die.

Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog

What is blue and smells like blue paint? Blue paint.

What was little Timmy's final words? I just want to go home.

Why cant jonny walk? He has no legs.

Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

A man comes home from work and finds his wife in bed with his next-door neighbor. Furious, he shouts 'What's the meaning of this?!' And his wife answers 'A pronoun used to identify a specific person or thing close at hand or being indicated or experienced'.

Evolution is real. Why? Pikachu evolves.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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