What did the suicide bomber say to the other suicide bomber? You're da bomb!

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What do you call an orange fruit? An Orange.

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Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

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Why was the Cubs fan sad? His wife just left him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't handle the stress and pressure of being a duck so it committed suicide by crossing a road and therefor being run over by a car.

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Why didn't Kurt Cobain drive to work on Monday? He killed himself.

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Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? No. Trees don't jump

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You know what's catchy? A cold

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What is the biggest lie in everyone's childhood? "School lunch food is actually good."

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An owl and a squirrel were sitting on a tree branch. An acorn fell on the squirrel's head and surprised, the owl moved its head 3.276 degrees to the right. The squirrel apologized for the inconvenience, but the owl would not listen, so flew off to buy a ferry to help children with terminal illnesses get to school.

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What happens when a black man spills all of his grape soda? He cleans it up and recycles the empty can

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What's big and hairy my penis just kidding It's Bigfoot

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What do you get if you cross a bomb expert, and a homophob? a blowjob

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why did the chicken cross the road? to commit suicide.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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What do you say when the cheese isn't yours? The cheese does not belong to me.

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What is an emulation? I am not as stupid as I seem by the way, I am just a bit shaky myself, but don't you worry i will answer whatever you need,

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The guy above me has a very nice joke

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Why did the chicken cross the street? I would rather live in a world a chicken's motives would not be questioned.

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Who would win in a chess duel between Ender Wiggin and Artemis Fowl? Artemis Fowl will calculate the optimal path to move his pieces. Ender Wiggin will calculate the optimal path to kill the queen, so all the other pieces just sort of fall down.

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A jew, a catholic and a muslim walk into a bar. The catholic man dies of a massive heart attack and the other two men mourn their friend for weeks.

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A woman is getting in the shower but the the doorbell rings so she puts on her towel and gets the door a man is there asking for sugar. Then she gets back into the shower then the doorbell rang again so she puts on her towel and anwsers the door another man is there he asked for some batteries she gave him some and went back to the shower. Then she hears the doorbell again she thought since there wasn't anybody else that lived on her street she decided to just go to the door without her towel so she answers the door thinking the blindmans there and it was the police man.

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who is gay for wild ones- Ryan Mcgggguigan

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops