Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

What did the starving kid say to the starving parent? Pineapple

What do you call a woman in the kitchen? Her name.

Q: What's brown and looks like a weasel? A: A weasel.

Knock knock Who's there A girl scout A girl scout who? A girl scout trying to sell cookies to support her alcoholic parents who beat her

what do you call a homeless man? poor.

what do you call a fat black cat and a skinny white dog? Freckles and Spot

What did the ocean say to the other ocean? - nothing oceans are inanimate objects that are incapable of talking.

There was an old lady from Ealing Who had a peculiar feeling She lay on her back Opened her crack And pissed all over the ceiling The old lady then lay in her own waste for over two weeks due to neglect by uncaring nursing home staff. Six months later, a hidden camera documentary on underperforming care homes exposed the abuse and neglect and the old lady went to live with her son and his family. In the early hours of May 14th 2011, the whole family were killed in a house fire that gutted the home and saw fires spread to neighbouring houses. Firefighters say the blaze originated in the spare room and was caused by exposed wiring on an electrical blanket. Forensic experts said that the repeated urination on the blanket would likely corrode the wiring due to the acidic content of urine.

A Jewish man, black guy, and asian all walk into a bar. Can you guess which one got arrested? That's right, the criminal

Add William Wright On Facebook Answer- www.facebook.com/public/William-Wright

Soooo... a black man walked into a bar and asked the bartender for a beer.

Why did the handicap man scream for help? Because he fell out of his wheel chair

When he was a little boy, what was Chaz Bono's favorite Cher song? Chaz Bono was never a little boy, he was a girl.

Why don't you throw a rock at a Mexican on a bike? Because depending on the size of the rock, you could seriously injure him.

Q:Whats worse, being chased by a chainsaw or being dunked on by LeBron James? A:Since a chainsaw has one of the sharpest metal blades know to mankind, it would be the chainsaw. Although this reguires effort, it is a known fact that Lebron James has been dunked on by some kid at Xaiver, so I would think the chainsaw would hurt more.

Do you also think Daffy Duck is really attractive when he dresses up like a woman? Yeah, me neither...

What made people stop likeing Ice tea? Ice-T

knock knock? whose there? i dont know. i dont know who? i dont know.

A hero is nice to everyone, but one person. who is that? Your mom. WOOOOOOOT!! YOU JUST GOT MUSCLEMANED!!!!

Q: What does a baby and an old man have in common? A: They both pee in public

Yo momma so ugly, except she's not. She's looking beautiful today.

What is red and smells like blue paint? Read paint.

What's worse than losing your job? Getting repeatedly hit in the face with a brick after getting fired from your job.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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