What did the turtle say to the hare? Nothing. Animals can't speak.

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Whats blue and white and red all over? The American flag

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Why was a black man in a prison cell? He was a highly respected plumber fixing a prisoner's faulty toilet.

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What's better than winning the paraplegic Olympics? Walking.

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Why was the black man in the hotel so upset? I shit on his chest.

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A child logs on to antijoke.com he is a chronic masturbator

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What's better than seeing a Detroit Lions game? Not being in Detroit.

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A Polish man is walking down the street carrying a brown paper bag. He runs into one of his buddies, who asks, "Hey! What's in the bag?" The man tells his friend that he has some fish in the bag. His friend says, "Well, I'll make you a bet. If I can guess how many fish you have in the bag, you'll have to give me one." The man replies, "I'm sorry, my friend, but gambling is against my morals, especially when my family's only nutrition for the week is on the line."

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What's circular and round A circle

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what do JFK, plato, and a dead penguin have in common? theyre all dead.

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what did sandy say to mr krabs nothing squirles are not smart enough to make a air tank and go under water

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

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A priest, a rabbi and a proctologist walk into a bar. Why is there a bar lying in the middle of the sidewalk?

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What the difference between a duck? One of the legs is both the same.

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What kind of a prediction is THAT?

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How do you make a clown cry? Kill his family

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WWII veteran screamed! "You d@mn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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Why did the father not text back? He died in a car crash

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what happens when u mix a car, a blimp and a plane? I don't know.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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I really might try and kill myself when I get home tonight.

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-Knock Knock ~Who's there? -It's your mother ~Go away

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There was a black and a mexican man in a car. Who was driving? None of them; it was the police driving.

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Why was the blonde girl stupid? She had suffered sever brain damage the previous month and was still recovering.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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