Roses are red, Violets are blue, You were adopted and I couldn't think of a good way to tell you...

What did little Mindy Granger find on her paper route? Human teeth.

Yo Momma Is Soooo Fat She Is Highly Obese

What do you call a muslim in an airplane? Whatever his name may be, though you could, of course, choose not to address him, though if it were a two-seater plane, it would be good manners to exchange polite conversation.

where are the maternaty clothing in walmart???? The C section

EAT YOUR DINNER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why did the man fall of his bike? He wasn't on his bike, i drowned him yesterday.

Why was the little kid sad at a funeral. He was actually happy and he was at six flags

Why did 3 blacks guys start watching the first Star Wars movie on Saturday night? They finished the Back to the Future movies on Friday.

How do you upset an Mexican? Kill his entire family.

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Pizza guy. Just a minute, I have to grab my wallet.

What did the Dementia sufferer get for Christmas?

Why couldn't Sarah see through her telescope? She was blind

Hey I just met you. And this is crazy. So get in my van. Cause I have candy.

Two cannibals were eating a man, one at the top and one at the bottom. The cannibal at the top said, "are you having fun down there?" The cannibal at the bottom said, "yeah, I'm having a ball!"

What's worse than a fly in your soup? Getting killed in a plane crash.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

Why does a chicken lay an egg? If she'd throw it it would break.

What's the difference between an orange? The horse because the vest has no sleeves.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin get in the Batmobile.

What did the black man say about Linkin Park? That there's obviously a rapist in their midst and they should all be questioned.

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What did Kim Kardashian say when she got a breast implant? DERP!

(This is a joke made up by the young son of a friend of mine many years ago. It is still one of my favorite jokes.) Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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