What do you call a not as grumpy Jewish man in his mid 30s? Danny. What do you call 5 of his best friends? Arin, Suzy, Barry, Ninja Brian, And Ross. Another possible answer to the 1st question is currently not married.

why did the chicken cross the road? becasue he wanted to. also he didnt want to be involved in the holocost

Have you seen Stevie wonders new house..... It's ok he hasn't either.

Apple juice.

why did the chicken go to the man? TO ask if he wants sex for money

If a tree falls in the forest, and only a deal man is there at the time, does it make a sound? And what are his odds of not being trapped under it, awaiting rescue?

What did the mute say to the deaf man?

I have a joke that involves a duck. Can you guess what it is? If not, then.......uh...........sorry.

Hey, you wanna hear a joke? The holocaust.

Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are having a baby. Even Stevie Wonder saw that one coming.

What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable? Finishing the wheelchair.

Want to know whats funnier than 24? 25

A nhiger walked up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand. "do you have any lemonade" the man said "no. we don't serve nhigers lemonade. but you can drink your own piss boy, thats home made.." the nhiger waddled away (waddle waddle) till the very next day. The nhiger walked up to the lemonade stand with a lawsuit file right in his hand and said "you are legally required to serve me lemonade" the man said "fu(k you nhiger go back to where you came go back to Africa it's full of aids" the nhiger said "goodbye".... i'm too lazy too finish this off so i'll spoil the ending, the nhiger was actually a smelly pakistanian, which was actually a dirty chi-nk in costume. let's just say lawsuits were filed but the lemonade stand owner had casey anthony's lawyer and in the end never had to serve fu-cking nhiger ,smelly pakies or dirty chin-ks again :) The End. Happily Ever After.

Two Mexicans walk into a bar, The bartender says your hired.

Do you know what's impossible? A chink whos not smart.

Three baby seals walk into a club...

America were the American dream is something only foreigners believe in

What did the starving kid say to the starving parent? Pineapple

A legless and armless woman is laying on the beach. A man walks by and hears her crying. "What's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been kissed before" says the woman. So the man leans down and kisses her. The next day the man sees the woman crying at the beach again. "What's wrong this time?" asks the man. "I've never been hugged before" So the man picks up the legless and armless woman and gives her a big hug. The next day the man sees the woman still on the beach crying. "Okay now what's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been f---ked before" says the woman. So the man picks up the woman, and has sex with her. They end up going on several dates later on and getting married at sunset on the very beach where they met.

A nuclear device is dropped on hiroshima. Does it make a sound? The answer is yes because the americans are laughing in Enola Gay

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passenger seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

Whats worse than three dead women in a ditch ? 4 dead women in a ditch.

MC donald the duck loves Justin's Balls. And Daniel Ma loves fried chicken boiled with rice \Cupcake

OR SOMETHING! VOLUME ONE SPECIAL ALPHA MAN EDITION: What do you do if you are in the jungle, and surrounded by a tiger, and a jaguar and have only one bullet left in the rifle? You shoot the damn jaguar in its tire, and RIDE THE GODDAMN TIGER BACK HOME! MORAL MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN! THE FRIENDLY NEIGHBORHOOD R*PIST!(Yes I also wrote the original kay?)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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