If it looks like a chicken and acts like a chicken, its most likely not a deadly crab running towards you with a knife that has rabies and is afraid of towels.

Did you hear about the guys who wanted to go to Hawaii??? They didn't go!

If I have a penny, and I give it to Michael Jackson, What will he do with it? Nothing. He's dead.

How are cars made? By magic.

Why did the baby cross the road? A very uncaring parent left their infant outside. The unsupervised baby then crawled under the fence and began to head towards the road. When the baby began to cross the road, there were two cars coming from both directions. Luckily, they saw the baby and came to an abrupt stop. Unfortunately, when the baby made it to the other side, an eagle swooped down and snatched the baby, because it is a bird of prey. Fortunately, the child's life was spared by the eagle. The Department of Child Services showed up later only to confiscate the baby from the parents. The eagle wanted to adopt it, but it could not speak nor could it sign the legal documents because it was an eagle.

What did America get on the 11th September? 9/11

What's The Difference Between A Refridgerator And The Holocaust ? Not Much.

if chuck norris had 5 dollars and you had 5 dollars he would have 10 dollars

A Jew and a Nazi encountered each other on the street. They exchanged pleasant greetings and carried on in their desired directions.

What's a black person's favorite thing to eat? Food.

Why did the airplane crash? The pilot was a tomato.

A Penguin walks in to a bar. then he walks out.

Knock Knock Nobody answered because the people in the house were away.

how many jews can you fit into a car 5, two in the front three in the back

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had a gun to its head

What is the difference between finding a dead black man on the street or a dead dog? There are tire marks in front of the dog.

How do you upset an Mexican? Kill his entire family.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

What is the best way to run a race? Start out fast, run fast in the middle, and finish fast.

What did 7 say to 6? I hear you've been spreading stories about me.

Those who can't teach... Aren't teachers.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

What do you a black man who isn't flying a plane? Well, that depends on his occupation.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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