knock knock who's there me i kill you

Girl: Want to stay over at mine tonight? Guy: Yeah I'd love to! Girl: Tough, you can't

Dick in your vagina fuck cock cunt shit

Q:Way C'nt U reed tHis? A: Because im retarted -ian surprenant

How do you make a momma bird not fly back to its nest? Burn it down!!

A man hits a woman while driving. Whose fault is it? The mas. He was out drinking that night and shouldn't have gotten in his car in the first place.

Patient: Doctor Doctor I think I have HIV! Doctor: Wtf to that one...

How do you drop a raw egg on to the floor without cracking it? Any way you want, it is very hard to crack concrete.

....ZZzzzzz.....ZZzzzzz.....

An unarmed man robbed a bank today, he failed because he had no way of carrying the cash out.

What's white and bobs up and down in a babies crib? A pedophiles ass.

Who is Jonathan Ezell He is Jonathan Ezell

Roses are red, Sometimes they're white. Or pink. Or yellow. There are roses of many colors.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue No they're not They're purple

Why couldn't the black man swim? Both of his legs were just eaten by a shark.

A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says: both your legs are broken in 10 places, you will never walk again.

A ginger kid and his 5 friends walk into a bar

who's that hot blonde at the disco? your mother.

Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? Because he crossed the road

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender asks: "why the long face?" The horse replies: "my wife has terminal cancer."

What's the difference between basketball and an elephant? One's a sport and one's a large African animal.

One day a man was out fishing in the lake. Suddenly, there was a huge fish pulling his fishing pole so hard it almost broke. Luckily, he managed to pull the fish into his boat. It was the biggest fish he had ever caught and he brought it home for his family to see. They were all very proud.

What's brown and sticky? A stick

You wanna see my secret freckle? NO! How about my butt? What!!!!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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