Why are small clowns and baby's alike? They both dreadfully die when hit in the face with an axe!

Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

One day an Indian boy asked his father why they have such long names? The dad answered him in a such a simple and concise way, that the little boy understood.

I called this hot girl up from class one day. She told me to come over because no one was home. I got to her house, and no one was home.

I ran in to Hitler. "Hey, Hitler, what's up?" I asked. "Well, this time I am going to kill 6 million Jews and 2 clowns." "Two clowns?" I ask. "Why two clowns?" "See!" He exclaimed. "No one cares about the Jews!"

One day a child goes to the doctor and says, "it hurts when do this" as he pokes his throat. The doctor, after several well-performed deep tissue testing, diagnosed the child with stage four esophageal cancer. The child cried himself to sleep that night.

A child logs on to antijoke.com he is a chronic masturbator

What the difference between a duck? One of the legs is both the same.

What did the man get when he returned from Africa? AIDS

what do JFK, plato, and a dead penguin have in common? theyre all dead.

A priest, a rabbi and a proctologist walk into a bar. Why is there a bar lying in the middle of the sidewalk?

what did sandy say to mr krabs nothing squirles are not smart enough to make a air tank and go under water

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one doesn't

What's better than winning the paraplegic Olympics? Walking.

Why was the black man in the hotel so upset? I shit on his chest.

Who invented chocolate? I don't know! Keep it to yourself.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't. Before it could cross, it was killed and then consumed by an average American

Who killed the ears of every human being? -Rebecca Black

Whats blue and white and red all over? The American flag

What do you get when you cross a black man and a mule. Arrested.

What did the turtle say to the hare? Nothing. Animals can't speak.

A Polish man is walking down the street carrying a brown paper bag. He runs into one of his buddies, who asks, "Hey! What's in the bag?" The man tells his friend that he has some fish in the bag. His friend says, "Well, I'll make you a bet. If I can guess how many fish you have in the bag, you'll have to give me one." The man replies, "I'm sorry, my friend, but gambling is against my morals, especially when my family's only nutrition for the week is on the line."

When life gives you lemons you have lemons.

What's better than seeing a Detroit Lions game? Not being in Detroit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...