How do you get to pigs in a pen? Move them.

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an indian woman works at seven eleven. this is because her son has one leg and she needs to pay pay for all the medical needs.

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A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

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How to you confuse an Alzheimer's patient? Present her with a complicated nuclear physics problem.

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My sister had a lemonade stand once. And one time, she spilled.

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Yeah sure comment below, and soylent green is fucking people! Moral: "You are judging the spitting image of yourself, except that you are doomed to remain ignorant and judgmental"

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Why did the maid have to clean feces off the wall? Because I shit cannoned it.

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Why was the bus driver sad? The kid with the icecream had c4 strapped to his chest.

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Wanna here a good joke?

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If the best things in life are free, whats the hardest things in life? Death.

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heads up!

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Why did the hamster not eat it's food? Because it wasn't hungry.

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why did chuck norris walk on water? because he's chuck norris

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Knock Knock Who's There? Dave I don't know a Dave, Please leave.

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What's more easier to break than a thin stick? A woman's neck.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the food source on its original side was running low, thus forcing the chicken to find other food options.

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so there are 2 muffins in an oven,1 says to the other "holy s**t its hot in here!" and the other says,"omg!its a talking muffin!"

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Sex positions (and other related things), never took off... 1. The 96 2. The mission (impossible) position. 3. The Tangoers party (swingers? The fack is that?) 4.Nasal. 5. Bed waltz (requires amazing dancing skills and multitasking, now they just call everything for "bed waltz" to show off) 6.Blind Date take uno (hard to find two blind people and make sure they meet each other and have a good time by themselves). 7. GILFS take one (I mean there could be many hot grandmas out there, but "Guns Id Like For Shooting", was not too popular due accidents)

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Top ten reasons Microsoft Doors is better than Microsoft Windows. 1. Easier to open. 2. Doors do not crash... Windows does! 3. Watching pron? Your mother around? JUST SLAM THAT SHlT ON HER FACE! 4. Saves power! (Its easier to just shut and open doors) 5. Doors are a lot easier to get trough than windows. 6. When windows wishes you welcome the first time you install it, you still cant wipe your damn feet on it! 7. Its easier to surf on the internet on top of doors than on windows. 8. While Windows is easy to hack because you can try codes forever, you can just buy a good lock on your door and shut it. 9.The sun glaring on your screen trough your windows? GET MICROSOFT DOORS! 10. I dare you make one, i live doing this shit. Capcom before. And special thanks to you! Thanks for playing! Capcom now: Fuck off thats not DLC paywall! its actual downloadable only content! Just pay 45 bucks to get all colors to all characters.... ...Downloading Allcolors 10kb

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a carpet? I don't sell carpets.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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How many women does it take to replace a light bulb? Please advise. Thanks, Holly

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Doctor, my husband tells me he doesn't like my figure .... That's irrelevant now, you've contracted a rare blood disease and will be dead within a month.

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The Duck walks up to the lemonade stand and says to the man running the stand...Hey bum bum bum....How much is the lemonade

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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