Nope, but yeah Felix looks a lot like Mickey Mouse, I think, nah it was Oswald the Lucky rabbit I believe, and he used to get his ass kicked by... Damn, what`s the name of the fat cat that beat up Mickey in steamboat willie?

Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

Why can't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she's a woman.

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its body.

Why was the black boy late for school? He missed the bus

Why was the frog sad? Because he had a boy's face stapled to his feet.

What was the motto of the Holocaust? Yolo.

giddy goat

I took my mum for a big shop the other day, we used the parent and child spot, not like there's an age range on it. - Peter Kay Try parking in the furthest spot away from the shop and you might burn some calories. -Me

How do you get 4 Jews in a car? Open the door and tell them politely to get in.

CAN YOU FIND YOUR D I C K YET BOMBER

What did the blue man say to the red lady? Do you want to make purple? -A.M.M

What did the flight attendant get for Christmas? A Trebuchet from medieval times dating back to the 12th Century CE.

Tell me fuck you Fuck you No fuck your mum

Mum: Black or white iPod? Her Son: Black Please, it'll run faster.

whats long and pointy and guys always have to brag about whos got the biggest one? their christmas trees

Your mom is so fat, that when she went to the doctor, the doctor told her she had Type II Diabetes.

Why black guys are the fasttest runners? Because the slowers are already in prison

Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

What's the difference between a Jew and a Generator? One powers your house...and then there's the generator.

Why did the chicken cross the road? An even better question is why are the chicken morals being questioned every time it feels like doing something.

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

How do you stop the neighbors kids from jumping the fence into your property? Molest them.

A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, we've got a drink named after you!". The grasshopper turns and says "You've got a drink named Steve?"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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