What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - Could you please take a look at my neck it has been hurting there for several weeks now.

If Jimmy had 5 apples and his brother had 5 apples then their father would have been married to their mother before they were born.

what looks like a bananna but is blue a blue bananna

Q: How do you confuse a blonde? A: Kill her entire family.

theres a black guy and a mexican whos driving the cop

What's red and curly and goes 100km an hour? Palfi in a blender

There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

What's worse than getting an F on your paper? Walking in on a man wearing your mother's skin after vigorously raping her in front of your baby sister.

Q: What's green and goes through walls? A: A pickle, you just have to throw it really hard.

Two penguins are in the shower. One of them asks if he can have the soap. The other responds, "What am I, a telephone?"

A woman fell victim to nasty car accident. Her injuries were very grave. The doctors warned her family that she had two hours to live. She died two hours later.

How do you make a basketball team short You cut off their legs

What did the Pitchfork say to the Gremlin? Nothing, because its a pitchfork, and gremlin's don't exist.

I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

"Docter, docter, I think I have cancer!" "I don't really care."

Q.why did the woman die A.she left the refrigerator door open then left the kitchen

Roses are red Violets are blue That's what they tell me Because I'm blind

What made the lady dance? Bandz!

What did the man do when it was raining pineapples? He got a chainsaw and went on a killing spree against his neighbors family.

- Knock knock. - Who's there? - I am. - I am who? - You are Steve. - Indeed.

How many dead babies will fit in a bathtub? Seventeen

In soviet russia, roses are violet

Q: What's worse than seeing a scorpion A: being stung by that scorpion

Guess what. Butts. www.youtube.com/c/LouisGames www.twitch.tv/KiLM_Ghostz

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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