What's the square root of everything. F**K LOGIC

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

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Heil Hitler!!!!!! Why thankyou General Himmler. Would you care to join me for supper this evening?

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Your family is dead. Your family is dead, who? Your family is dead.

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wanna hear a joke? womans rights

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A man walks into a bar. He walks out 10 minutes later because he was satisfied with the new hooker he killed and made out with in the bar's bathroom.

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Roses are Red Violets are Purple Not blue

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Q :Why cant mexicans be firemen A :because they get mixed up by Hosea and Hose B

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Why were people laughing when Muhammad Ali signed autographs for his fans? He was making jokes regarding his Parkinson's syndrome in order to elevate an otherwise melancholy experience for the audience.

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A mother took her little boy to church. While in church the little boy said, "Mommy, I have to pee." The mother said to the little boy, "It's not appropriate to say the word 'pee' in church. So, from now on whenever you have to 'pee' just tell me that you have to 'whisper.'" Then the mother, realizing how her son could later become confused, clarified. She said, "You can say you have to pee as long as you say it in a quiet voice." The boy understood. There were no problems afterwards.

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Why did the man cross the road? He was hungry and homeless, and in search of chicken.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his toadstool.

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what's the last thing you want to hear during surgery? your wife complaining

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What do you call a gay scientologist? His first name or last name, depending on how close you 2 are.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. That is highly improbable, due to the fact he is in a wheelchair.

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How did the man drown the fish? He ate it.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Yes.

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Why did the black man get pulled over by a cop? He was driving 12 miles over the speed limit.

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When life gives you lemons, you're probably at Mr. Life's fruit stand over on Imperial Avenue.

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what did the kid say when he didnt see the ice and sliped and broke his arm ouch that beep hurt

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Q: whats the differences between a bra and the canucks?? A: a bra has two cups

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there was a rich kid strolling in the woods.he saw a bear, HE DIED

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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