What does Helen Keller's parents do when she gets in trouble? They leave the plunger in the toilet!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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Whats, red, blue, green, yellow, feels like popcorn, looks like jello, tastes like hydrogen peroxide and smells like burning logs? i dont know. i was asking you

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Gotta go Fast Gotta go Faster Faster Fasterfasterfaster! Moving at the speed of sound I'm the quickest hedgehog around Got ourselves a situation Start getting a new location Without any explanation On top of relaxation! Go- Go- Go- Don't blink Don't think Just Go go go go G-g-g-g-go go! Sonic, he's on the run Sonic, he's number one Sonic, he's coming next so watch out for Sonic X! Gotta go fast, gotta go faster faster faster fasterfasterfaster Go go go go go go go go go! Sooooniiiiic X!!

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whats funny about female tennage life? SELF HARM OOOOO YEAHHHH

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hey do you eat out a woman properly? you cook her first and then eat her. -jeffery dahmers

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I was at work today and whilst staring at my beautiful colleague I realised how hard it had got. So I quit

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A man went to the doctor, complaining about not feeling well after dancing the night before. The doctor quickly rushed to the surgeon to get ready for the liver transplant that had to take place.

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why did katy fall off her bike?

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you lose.

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A dyslexic agnostic insomniac stays up at night wondering if there's a dog.

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what did the guy say when he lost his sandwich? wheres my sandwich?

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A woman walks into the kitchen to make a sandwich because she is hungry and she likes sandwiches.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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Do you know the muffin man? No

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children burning

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What's Big and Round? My Testicular Cancer

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What did the black person use to peel a banana? His hands.

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what is the difference between joe diragi and jerry sandusky sabdusky only targets human little boys

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please dis this joke, I want to get to the bottom of the leaderboard!

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What would happend if two nyan cats crashed into each other? It would be a great impact and we'd all be sad.

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What happens when a jew with a boner runs into a wall? He hurts his face.

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*ahem* what? what. oh I thought you said something

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. What does one say to the other? Nothing. They are both inanimate objects and can't speak.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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