Why did the shrimp refuse to share? Because he was a little shellfish.

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Roses are red, violets are blue. This is a poem about flowers.

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What is the best way to put out a fire? Stop, drop and have an 0rgy.

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Why was the house painted pink? I dont know, why don't you ask the owner?

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Why was the boys dick hard? Because he stuck it in a hole in the snow.

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Sex.

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how do you boil oil? add b to oil

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how do you beat up 3 year old with ease? you beat her up, 3 years can't fight for shit.

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A man walks into a bar... who cares what happens after that Charlie Sheen is winning and Osama Bin Laden is dead

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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What did the sheep say when he broke a leg? Nothing, sheeps can't talk.

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Why did I kill the Muslim because I'm smart

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Q:why did the lion eat the zebra? A: because it was hungry.

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong WALKS on the moon. Michael Jackson rapes little boys

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Neither have I

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A horse walks in a bar. The barman asks: "Why the long face?" The horse replies: I have aids.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? ..............

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My name's Dave, Microwave!

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What's black and white and red all over? A referee eating a red Popsicle on a hot summers day.

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Q: what did a kid in harlem get for christmas? A: nothing he got shot

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A pig, a chicken, and a cow are born on 3 separate barns. They are raised by old men who subside off the grains of the field. When the animals mature, the farmers will butcher the pig, slaughter the chicken, and gut the cow. The farmer who raised the chicken may enjoy a few eggs first but the animals will all die eventually. Either of natural causes or more likely being butchered for profit. Cows make milk.

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A Scotsman, an Englishman and an Irishman walk into a bar and the barman asks "Is this some kind of a joke?"

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What did one hostage say to the other hostage? Hrmfhrmfphmfr

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops