What did the Homeless man get for Christmas? A dollar

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yo mama so fat that the doctor asked for her weight not her phone number!

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What is it worse than a bee sting ? -Two bee stings What 's worse than two bee stings ? -The holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust ? -3 bee stings

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Were can you find a bag of meth? A drug dealer

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Q:Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Conrad Barry

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What do you call a man with one ear? A one-eared man.

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How do you make a dyke moan? Insert a BEAVER in it!

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Why did the baby cry? Because he fell off a refrigerator.

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Why is cameron haythorp gay? Answer- He showed his willy to robet tuner

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A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

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What do you call an Arab with a long beard? An Arab with a long beard you stereotypical piece of crap.

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person: Knock knock. Me: Who's there? person: A Hipster. Me: False.

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Seven people walk into the same bar, like a solid pole. Ouch!

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I took my mum for a big shop the other day, we used the parent and child spot, not like there's an age range on it. - Peter Kay Try parking in the furthest spot away from the shop and you might burn some calories. -Me

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Roses are grey, violets are grey, everything is grey, i'm a dog.

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Whats worse than falling off a bike? rape.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge asked "Mum, why is my name Fridge?" to which she replied "Because you deserve to be in one."

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One day, a bear happoned across a man and said "How do you do today good sir?" but the man ran away screaming "OH CRAP, BEARS!!!!" because it just sounded like bear growling (which i would love to dedicate to my friend Chris Bradley, just to make the ball to stick ratio too high)

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Have you ever tried Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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Wood is brown...... Grass is green...... Now what color are roses?

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Why is my room black and white? Because your in a black and white movie.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are red Violets are blue Roses are red Violets are blue whilst you reading this I just raped you

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What's big, red, has green and puple spots and responds to "here boy"? Nothing, not to my knowledge anyway!

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because your a fag.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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