What did the flight attendant get for Christmas? A Trebuchet from medieval times dating back to the 12th Century CE.

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Why did Billy fail his math quiz? Because he's stupid.

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Your mom is so fat, that when she went to the doctor, the doctor told her she had Type II Diabetes.

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What's white and bobs up and down in a babies crib? A pedophiles ass.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? An even better question is why are the chicken morals being questioned every time it feels like doing something.

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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How do you stop the neighbors kids from jumping the fence into your property? Molest them.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he can make before the car hits him.

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What starts with 'P' and ends with 'orn'? Popcorn.

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What do a black man and an apple have in common? They are both carbon based life forms.

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A blind man walks into a bar. He cannot read the drink menu.

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Why did Sally flunk math? Because she didn't achieve the passing grade which is 60 percent or greater. She might need some tutoring in order to master the concept of the lessons to which she has difficulty solving.

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What is the difference between a cow and a human? A lot of things.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? The victim of a freak genetic mutation and extremely susceptible to predators, meaning it will live a short life in the wilderness.

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Why did Bert go to the doctor? He had an appointment.

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Pizza guy. Just a minute, I have to grab my wallet.

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What do you call a muslim in an airplane? Whatever his name may be, though you could, of course, choose not to address him, though if it were a two-seater plane, it would be good manners to exchange polite conversation.

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What's harder than winning an argument with a woman. Lonsdaleite which has recently been declared the hardest substance known to man, and can withstand 58% more stress than the hardest diamond crystal.

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Why did the girl scream for help? She was being raped.

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What do you do if you have a worm in your apple you throw it away

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Q. Where do you find Indonesia A. On a map

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What do you call a banana that just got pealed A banana

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Wha did the fireman say when he burnt his finger? Shit.

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vaginas

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops