What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education. It is also possible that he was chosen for the position because of acquaintances or family members who were also employed by the company, but many people would consider it impolite to bring up this possibility, as it might be construed as denigrating the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study.

What do you call a car that is green? A Green Car.

So these two gay guys walk backwards into a bar.

A woman walks into a sex sop, she buys a dildo.

Why was Tom flunking in school? He had a learning disability.

did you know that Hellen Keller had a tree house? "no" she didn't know either.

Roses are red Violets are blue I regurgitate doorknobs

What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

A man walks into a barn the n was not visible

Knock knock. Who's there? Ostrich. Ostrich who? No no I don't have a formal name, I'm just telling you I'm an ostrich.

What has feathers, and is known to fly? A bird

A: Ask me if I'm a truck. B: Are you a truck? A: No.

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why'd the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey Why'd the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure Why'd the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? his girlfriend broke up with him so he commited suicide Why'd the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? cuz it was a dumbass

A horse walks into a bar why the long face? I have aids

I have no soul so I must consume yours

How do you make a baby cry? Break its legs.

A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they got married and lived happy together for the rest of their lifes.

Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

HEY are you aware of how tired your suitcase is? Sorry, I rest my case.

i like serious. serious means business. business means cash. cash means money. money makes me happy and when i'm happy you dont die

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am colourblind so screw you!

You

What did the psychiatrist say to the man when he walked into his office naked and wrapped in saran wrap? I can see your 'nuts'...

What does a blonde do in her spare time. Why are you interested, creep!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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