Why couldn't the guy find his pants? Because his girlfriend stole them last night

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The hippo's an African beast, Who notably is quite obese, Quite boorish and mean And never too lean And poops in the rivers, at least...

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What do you say when a black girl asks you out? No!

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Two Irish men walk into a bar, order a drink and sit down to enjoy the drink and friednly conversation.

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they say that cancer can't pass but why do three our your uncles have it

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A man walks into a bar. He's covered in Ash because the north tower just collapsed.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I regurgitate doorknobs

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what did the cow said to the other cow? Moo

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ostrich. Ostrich who? No no I don't have a formal name, I'm just telling you I'm an ostrich.

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Why did the boy punch his teacher? Muscle spasms.

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Q: What's the meaning of life? A: Look in a Dictionary.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set. Cuz she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead Why'd the second monkey fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the first monkey Why'd the third monkey fall out of the tree? peer pressure Why'd the fourth monkey fall out of the tree? his girlfriend broke up with him so he commited suicide Why'd the fifth monkey fall out of the tree? cuz it was a dumbass

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What's te best part about having sex with twenty two year olds? There are 20 of them ;)

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I asked my Grandma if she ever tried 69. And she said, “No, but I have done 53 -- that's all the sailors I could screw in one night.”

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A guy walks into a bar. He now has a broken collar bone.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Cuz the chicken crossed the road

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Knock knock. Who's there? Michael Jackson.

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Did you hear the one about the Gay Irish Politician who was running for President?! He withdrew his candidacy.

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research.

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What do you call a man who stole from a thief? A thief, no matter whom you are stealing from the consequences are dire.

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whats worse than Brussels sprouts brussels sprouts that has petite vegetation, lack of sun causing mold and placed in a septic tank.

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How many dead children can you fit in a garbage can? Give me a knife and i will find out

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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