Tim tebow is the anti christ

thumb_up thumb_down -41

What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

thumb_up thumb_down -45

One day, I was looking at my brand new wooden table, and I thought, "wow, that is a very nice brand new wooden table." And then my dog peed on it. I killed the dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -139

How come the black man couldn't be seen on film? He could be seen on film, he's not a vampire.

thumb_up thumb_down -149

Why did the boy punch his teacher? Muscle spasms.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handle bars except for the duck

thumb_up thumb_down +38

a man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is slowly destroying his family

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's the longest, hardest thing on a black man? His femur.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What happened when the asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A baby seal walks into a club...

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Roses are red Violets are blue I am not using commas That is improper punctuation.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Husband: Shut up, there is now playing for Real Madrid Woman: So what? come help me clean. Husband:after the game,now shut up. Woman:Everyone knows Barcelona better... Police: So you're saying your wife fell on the knife alone?

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why are asians so smart? Because they study very hard and learn the material.

thumb_up thumb_down

How is nothing something if it is nothing?...

thumb_up thumb_down -2

The Paralympics! Even if you win, you're still retarded!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what is sam ross' favorite word to use in conversation? awesam

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

thumb_up thumb_down -102

Por que não passa Globo Esporte na Etiópia? Porque a Rede Globo não tem afiliadas por lá.

thumb_up thumb_down -114

A man sees Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles and tells his friends about the incident. They believe the story, because it is entirely plausible that it actually happened.

thumb_up thumb_down -132

What will you be doing right before you die? ... ... living.

thumb_up thumb_down +91

My friend told me to break a leg before the show. I disobeyed him and injured no one. It's just a figure of speech.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

Why can't Helen Keller drive? She didn't pass her driving test.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

Why did Doris have no control over her bladder? Because she was old and suffered catastrophic incontinence

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops