What to you do when a monkey walks into your bar? Quietly escort it out and into the nearest zoo.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

No, I still have to make sense of some facts bits and pieces here, and thinking is pretty much the only thing I can do at this moment, so why would my doppelganger wannabe call me from her mothers place?

why did the rabit lose the race? it was a dumb@$$

how long has dibey got left like :)

Justin Bieber.

Why did Billy cry? He had Pubic Lice

Why did the Mexican wait outside Home Depot all day? He was hoping to be hired as day-labor to provide for his family.

Two muffins were sitting in an oven. The first muffin did not look over to the other one and did not talk to it because muffins are objects and do not have the ability to communicate.

Q: What's green has four legs and would kill you if it fell off a roof and hit you? A: A pool table.

You're mama's so ugly, she will most-likely never meet a compatible mate and die alone.

if you read this you are gay

So a gay guy walks in a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says "We don't serve your kind, get out." The gay says he will drink in the corner. Later, a construction worker walks into the bar. He says," Man, I'm so thirsty I could drink the sweat off a cows balls." The gay guy in the corners says," Mooooooooo."

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doc I feel like a pair of curtains!" The doctor replied, "That's probably because you're schizophrenic."

Why didn't Hitler drink whiskey? Because it made him mean.

Womens rights

a man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is slowly destroying his family

I am not under the alkafluence of inkahlol. The drunker I am, the longer I get.

Why is Jem no longer a cartoon? Because they all died from toxic hairspray.

What happened when a myriad people decided to partake in a large party while staying in a small room? They managed to make a compromise. The party got split into two groups: 50% of the original total in each casual confinement. In the end, everybody had a great time and nobody got hurt.

why did the boy fall down? he was shot

A baby seal walks into a club...

What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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