What is dangerous when eaten? My grandmother's cooking?

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Did it hurt when you fell from heaven, or have you been in a wheelchair all your life?

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How many ecotards does it take to change a light globe? Ve Vill Change all ze light globes to use;less grey vuns and you vill luv it or else ve vill kill you to save ze planet

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why did the boy have no friends? cause he was smelly

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The scientists of Cambridge have finally developed a cure for feeling low! They have presented it in the style of a song. See if you can spot the hidden frequency wavelengths when you sing it out lout. They are what make you feel better. You've got to LOVE the world! Be a friend! And when You're down you've got to get up again! And when your blue, here's what you do. Just sing this happy tune! However if that fails, then you should consider getting professional help.

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life is a barrel of tomatoes...unless you paint them blue.

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What do you get if you give a black man more than 5 watermelons? Jeff the Killer.

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what do you call a toddler with a gun? uninteresting

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Why did the boy cry when he got circumcised? Because he couldn't fap.

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What did the mexican say to the black person? Hey there! How are you today?

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like saying the colors of flowers... how about you.

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What did the Crippled Orphan get for Christmas Cancer

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Why did little Timmy start crying? He was shot.

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What's brown and dirty? Dirt.

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Why did the baby die? Because he was shot in the hea repeatedly

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WHO LET THE DOGS OUT?!?!?!!! Not Michael Vick.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Grass is red. OH SHIT THE GARDENS ON FIRE!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because 2.5 million children in the world are suffering from HIV/AIDs.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car, Robin.

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What do you call a ostrich with no legs? Damn, that's funny.

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What's yellow and cant walk? The Sun

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What's worse than Fantasy Basketball? Playing Fantasy WNBA.

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Why did the 100 year old man die? He was really old and his heart stopped beating after his BLT.

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What did the boy say to the girl seductively eating a banana? A: bananas are my favorite fruit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops