Why did the condom drive over his pet mac and cheese? Because his uncle was not george bush.

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Why are there no aspirin factories in the Amazon Rainforest? Because it would be unprofitable to build a factory that requires a large workforce in an uninhabited area.

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What's the difference between and elephant and a banana? An elephant is grey.

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This is a haiku Haikus are not really jokes Congratulations!

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What do black people and apples have in common? Nothing.

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What do you do when your speeding and a cop is right behind you? make a complete stop and hope for the best

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Q: what is socialism? A: a terrible system

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Women. Can't live with them. Can't systemically murder them without compromising the reproductive integrity of the species.

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What's Green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

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What did the homicidal maniac say to his 13th victim? Nothing, she was dead at the time.

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Why did the man with every known fatal disease die? Old age.

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"Honey im home!" but his honey was dead on the floor along with his 3 kids.

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Why didn't the Mexican have car insurance? Because he was 12 years old and didn't have a car so he had no need for car insurance.

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what starts with b and ends with itch pickle

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A girl walks into a strip club, she was tired of her husband and wanted to see how it was actually done.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

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If you were in a room with Osama bin Laden, Hitler, and a black guy and you had two bullets, who would you shoot? Personally, I'm a peaceful person. I'd let Hitler figure it out.

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why did the chicken cross the road? I dont know, you ask it.

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How does a black chick tell if she's pregnant? When she pulls the tampon out, all the cotton is already picked.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because he's stupid.

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Where did Sheyanne go during the bombing...... Everywhere

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What did the Wife say to her husband about his Erectile Dysfunction? - Im sorry I dont know how to finish a joke based on this private a matter.

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It's Christmas Eve and your entire family is gone for 12 hours to by you presents. What will you do while there gone? By the time you figured out what you will do you will hear a knock at your door. It's the police they are here to tell you your entire family was murdered during a shooting at the mall. The sad part is you will not receive your NEW Beats, your Xbox 1, or your make up.

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Knock knock! who's there? Excuse me sir can I have a moment to talk to you about our lord and savior Jesus Christ?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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