What salad was served in the salad bar on the Titanic? Probably a selection of green leaves, radishes, cucumber, sliced hard boiled egg and cherry tomatoes, topped with cress, mixed seeds and a delicate dressing.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Teenage pregnancy.

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When life gives you lemons, make beef stew.

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What ticks and makes a very loud noise? the bed

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What did the man say to the teacup? Nothing. He was drunk and on the floor.

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Whats worse than finding a giant spider in your bedroom? Loosing it...

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What's the bright side of Jimmy only having one leg? There isn't one.

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Where did Suzie go during the bombing? Everywhere. -Tag

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Chuck Norris is so tough, he trained diligently for many years and is now a widely respected martial artist

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I went to the zoo the other day there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu. By Nathan Luque CARROTS!!!

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I may have alzheimer's but at least I don't have alzheimer's.

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Whats worse than finding a repeated joke in anti-joke? The Holocaust.

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First the lord created light by shouti... ...Then the lord travelled back in time in order to create voice before that. The lord then said "I almost logic and everything failed at the very beginning. he corrected himself and saw it was good,

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Black, det er geita, banke driten ut av Anders, han griner, dreper ikke, vil du ha telefonen eller? Jeg kommer med den litt senere, skal bare tørke blodet først pønsha han hardt i tryne blør ifra knyttnevene, skal jeg knekke bena på han eller noe? Geita. Ps Pen fitte har du flere bilder av a elle? Hvilket rom?

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Adam ci ?mierdz?cy kutas mi sie ya mam

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Q: What is better than sex? A: A relationship where you can be completely intimate with your partner

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Scenario: A man is being mugged in an alley Mugger: Give me your wallet! I have a gun! Victim: You don't have the balls. Mugger: Oh yeah! I have 3 balls! Victim: Well I have 2, you should probably get that checked.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His whole family attempted to cross the road approximately 30 seconds earlier and were immediately struck by a moving vehicle traveling at 45 miles per hour. He crossed the road to try to comfort his family while they took their final breathes of life. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a man that had recently been laid off from his union job and came down with a disease that is considered uncurable by modern science.

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How do dogs mark their territory? With legal documents.

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(Guy)That's what she said. (His Girlfriend) And who is this she.

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hi

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Yo momma is so stupid, she has no job, five kids, and six weeks to live, due to the fact she spent all her money on cigarettes and now has lung cancer.

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Anyone??????????/

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"Whats your favorite number?" "9." "Is it because thats your jersey number." "Thats my jersey number?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops