One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you do after a murder kills your entire family? Nothing, he killed you too

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What is worse than seeing a pile of dead minorities? Dropping a dollar.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Steve buys 60 watermelons.. What does he have? A lot of watermelons.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

a mother: my little boy always asks me to take him to see dinosaurs...but they are extinct. me: take him to a museum you dumb bitch!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

You will not press the like button.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's sad about four black people going over in a cliff in Cadillac? It was my Cadillac.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Jake. Walsh.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Dr Dr I think I have diarrhea You have irritable bowel syndrome, I recommend IBS support

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Womens rights

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I have five fingers, When will you put the ring on the one NEXT to the middle one? Never?! F you.

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Why are Jewish men curcumsized? Because Jewish women wont put their hands on anything that's not 20% off

thumb_up thumb_down -25

Guess what. I eat weed and smoke yogurt

thumb_up thumb_down -25

"We wear pink on Wednesdays"" -Mean Girls, 2004

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family!!!!!!!!!!!!!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!!!!!!¡¡¡¡

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A man walks into a bar carrying a piece of asphalt under his arm. The bartender says, "We don't serve construction workers here."

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. Why? A. To get to the other side. A. Knock, Knock. B. Who's there? A. The chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Q: whats snoop doggs favourite weather? A: drizzle

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Knock Knock... Who's there? The FBI, you're going to jail. Really? No.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

just imagine like a whole mark no imagine like 1000 marks an army of marks ready to conquer

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Is that a banana in your pocket? As a matter of fact, yes it is.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's little and very sad? A 5-year old locked in a cage.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A hitman and his target walked in the same bar togather what happend? nothing because a hitman has better things to do and the target would lay low.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops