Why didn't the new baseball cap fit little Tommy? Because Tommy was decapitated

Why did the bus crash? What, you were expecting an answer? I was asking you

Knock knock! Who's there? F*ck. F*ck who? F*ck you.

What day comes after Friday? Saturday, and Sunday comes afterwards.

whats yellow and blue and green all over? the color green

What colour is chocolate? Brown.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had been running in the road's direction for some time, and continued travelling in that direction despite the road being in the way.

What do you call it when an Arabic man gets shot? Murder.

yo mamma so fat she got pied to be the Olympic swimming pool

Whats worst then finding drugs under you brothers bed finding your dead cat under his bed whats worst then finding your dead cat under your brothers bed finding your dead Gran whats even worst then that the Holocaust

How do you get a Virginia graduate off of your porch? Pay him for the pizza

Why does the cow have spots? Because it was born that way

A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

Howdid we get copper piping we put a Pennie between two Jules

A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen and warns him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and otherwise damaging consequences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm wearing pants and I'm hungry

PLEASE LIKE TO DONATE 50 CENTS TO MY CHARIDY .... SAVE THE PENGUINS IN AFRICA -BY LUKE BRANIFF

Why didn't the girl take her hairbrush to school? She has cancer and all her hair fell out.

I would rape her

Why does Rupert The Bear wear checkered trousers? Because he's a twat.

Roses are red, tires are black, why is your chest as flat as your back!

What did the blind, deaf and mute kid get for Christmas? Cancer

Roses are red Violets are red The grass is red OH MY GOD, THERE'S BLOOD EVERYWHERE!!!

My dads so gay he has sex with other men for fun.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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