Little Johnny was always bullied at school. Everyday he would get picked on by the same kid, Todd. Todd was a red-headed bully with no discipline. Johnny one day went home and started crying. His father asked the little boy, "Jonny why are you crying?" John replied, "I keep getting bullied". His father stood up and told him, "You must become a big man and step up to him and tell him how you feel. It will surprise him and he will then back off. It always works." Johnny then felt inspired. Later that night he started practicing what he will say in the mirror. By the next morning he felt like he was ready. Johnny was confident about himself for once. He walked up to Todd and told him, "I'm tired of your bullying and next time you will regret it!!". Todd looked surprised and had his jaw opened. Todd then said, "I'm sorry Johnny I didn't know you felt that way." Johnny looked confused. "Here come with me and I'll buy us ice cream". When they went to go get ice cream, Todd brutally stabbed Johnny until he was losing blood and repeatedly raped his dead body.

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What did the pedefile say to the child? Get in the van

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Two tomatoes walk across the street and manage to get over safely. COME ON MUSTARD!

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What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

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What do you call a black man driving a nice luxury sedan? A man who has, surprisingly, done very well in this economy.

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What do you call a black man that flies a plane? -A pilot

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What did the black man in a white 2007 Jeep Wrangler when he went over the speed limit? A speeding ticket

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What would Michael Jackson do if he were in a room full of kids? Nothing, he's dead.

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Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he was hungry. The teacher would stupid to say it was a piece of cake

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What did the frog order at McDonalds? Nothing, it's a frog.

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An old lady says, "Oh i see now." The guy standing next to her says, " Honey oyu know im blind right?"

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Why was 2 afraid of 3? Because 345!!!!!

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Yo mama so fat! Really she should get on an exercise program and watch her diet, as she is at higher risk for diabetes and other health issues

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "God" "Then come right in!"

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Roses are black, violets are black. I'm blind.

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How much is that doggie in the window? $4.95 + Shipping&Handling

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Knock knock who's thare Your mom She's dead you bitch

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There are two cows standing in a wide, green field eating hay. The first cow says: "Moo". The second cows says: "Thats funny, I was about to say that."

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Why did the Muslim enter the bar? He didn't.

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Knock Knock Whose there? Me! Hi

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What did the runner say after he ran 10 miles? I just ran 10 miles.

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jcjdj

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how did i know i had a new puppy?...... i found out when i was scraping it off my truck tire

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You know what's interesting about Polish people? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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