How Many Blondes does it take to open a fridge. 1 Because most blondes are smart and can open fridges.

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What do you call a black person on a bike? A cyclist.

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What's worse than getting a fly stuck up your nose? Been alone in a hospital room with Jimmy Saville.

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Why did the hipster burn his mouth? He ate the mac and cheese before it was cool.

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if a tree falls in the forest does it make a sound? if a tree falls in the forest and it falls on a mime, does anyone care?

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Why were Jews discriminated against for thousands of years? They weren't supposed to. Jews are people just like you and me. And for every ignorant person out there that hates Jews, you better watch your back because God is watching you.

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hy-way is-way is-thay oke-jay pelled-say eird-way? ecause-bay its-way in-way IGLATIN-PAY

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Q:John has 50 candy bars and he eats 45, what does john have? A: Diabetes

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69

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What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

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poop

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knock knock "whos there ?" "the police , your husband has died" "ok"

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Whys it so cold? Nuclear winter.

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(for comedians) I went to a coffee shop the other day. I ordered a coffee then sat down. Behind me there were two people talking. I didn't eves drop because it's impolite so I drank my coffee and left.

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what happens when u mix a car, a blimp and a plane? I don't know.

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an emo kid walks into mcdonalds and orders a happy meal

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What is brown and sounds like a pickle? Poop

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What did the banker say to the other banker? We're both bankers!

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why is a bad joke like a dull pencil? cuz thers no point!!!!

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Q:what do you call a black man in a wheel chair? A: a war veteran who accidentally stepped on a land mine while trying to protect his country.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Im Black And I Will Beat You Children At Checkers,They Can Be Red

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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Theres a monkey that walks into a bar. I forget the rest of the joke but your moms a w****

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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