Why did the teacher give out homework? she is a teacher

why did the fat guy become fat ...COD..

A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

Knock Knock. Did someone outside the front door just say "Knock Knock"?

Cleavlin has a shmaaala dik

why is blake oneal gay? because hes black and he likes peniss in his ass

knock knock who's there me i kill you

Whats worse than 2 holocausts? 2 and one tenth of a holocaust

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

Why did the black man die? He was shot

mom:why oh why are you such an idiotic nuisance? bobby:THATS HOW YOU WANTED ME BORN!!REMEMBER?you asked the doctor to put something in me to make me so stupid i wouldnt remember WHO gave birth to me!!

Did you hear about the Pole who studied for 5 days?

What's The Difference Between A Refridgerator And The Holocaust ? Not Much.

whats long and pointy and guys always have to brag about whos got the biggest one? their christmas trees

Knock knock... Whose there? Patrick Oh hey, come in...

A elementary school child was waiting at the bus stop for the bus to come. All of the sudden, the bus comes around the corner, pulls up, stops and he gets in.

Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to a chicken

What's Worse Than Unripened Fruit? Crippling Depression.

How do you seat four gay guys at a bar when there's only one stool? Flip the stool over.

Who is Jonathan Ezell He is Jonathan Ezell

Okay, but cut me some slack here, its not as straight forward as it sounds, I got at least twice as many active synapses as other people do, that means twice the thought process, in video games I can for example remember twice the commands, and such. Sadly this does not mean that I can think twice as fast or twice as smart, but rather that I do so involuntarily in short spans, until I burn myself out. So be a bit nice to me, when I say that I have since I was a kid used about 2.5-7.5 mg valium, this is just because my thought process works so fast I burn out because well, I got the processor, but it burns out, excuse me my wife needs some help with her cellphone, see you soon

What do you call 10 Asians playing basketball? A group of friends hanging out and having a good time.

How come the blind black guy couldent read because he is dead

Why did the boy get hit by the bus? He didn't check both sides before crossing

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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