What's Terry short for? He's missing a leg.

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yo mama so fat that the doctor asked for her weight not her phone number!

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Hey "Oren" its Red, sorry but I got to go now. How you been doing? Kinda missed you over here. So you actually care about how you sound now?

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What do you call a man with one ear? A one-eared man.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Chinese. What? Knock Knock.

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Why is the horny toad named that way? Because its a misnomer of the horned lizard.

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What did the Homeless man get for Christmas? A dollar

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

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Yesterday I was walking my dog and while I was walking my dog, guess what happened? It got hit by a bus.

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Roses are yellow Violets are carpet.. Get it...?

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Why did the giant frog attack the party goers with a ballistic missile? oh where tos tart...it's, just such a long story, I don't really know where to begin, in fact it's probably better if you just take my word for it, no need to go into details. we just don't have time for that now.

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What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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Q. What do you call cheese that's not yours? A. Stolen, you're under arrest.

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Brown Bear, Brown Bear what do you see? I see some poachers looking at that tiger over there.

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What hurts people but doesn't? Child Birth. -Dave Papile

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What starts with a P and ends with O-R-N? porn

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Students, please find the surface integral.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was ran over before it made it to the other side.

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A black man and a mexican are in a car. Whos driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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What's worse than having a mouth full of molars? A pole through your chest.

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Two ducks are in a bathtub. One duck says, "Hey, pass me the soap." The other duck says, "What do I look like, a type writer?"

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A bartender walks into the man and the bar said nothing because it was inanimate.

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Bob: Whats the difference between a fish and a microwave? Steve: I don't know Bob: Daaaamn your dumb!

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How many dead body can you hide in a hole? 100. Forget the fat guy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops