What do flowers and people have in common? They both die.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

This is my first joke don't ????mine. You did didn't you.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A priest, a pedophile, and a child rapist walks into a bar. He orders a beer.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Two guys walk into a bar. One man walks out of the bar at a similiar time.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chicken cross the street? Because it could without dying.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

John: Hey Pablo why are you standing outside Home Depot. Pablo: Because I work here.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

what do you call a guy called Bill? Bill

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did billy have a bruse? Because he got smacked with a belt. -Louis

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Susan went to Chemistry class, Susan is no more. For what she thought was H20 was H2S04 (sulfuric acid.)

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Roses are red, Stones are grey, This poem is obvious, You don't say??

thumb_up thumb_down -17

why did the frog cry? Because he didn't get a message

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q:How do you know if you have a big enough oven? A: If the jew fits

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Whats the difference between a horse and a snake? A snake is poisons, a horse is not.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: What did the littl boy with cancer get for christmas? A: Nothing, he didnt make it that far.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

The other day a man came to my door. After I opened it, he told me, "I'm sorry, your mother is dead." He paused, then said, "Just kidding." "Actually," I told him, "my mom died two years ago of natural causes." He turned around and left, and I closed the door. All in all, it was a very confusing situation, and I'm not sure how I feel about it.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust Whats worse than the holocaust? getting raped by a giant scorpion What's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? getting raped by your seventh grade math teacher, Mr. Smith What's worse than getting raped by your seventh grade math teacher Mr. Smith? Snapping your femur bone in half What's worse than snapping your femur bone in half? Birthing a dead baby

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Knock Knock Who’s there? Boo Boo who? Ah don’t be sad, Boo’s here to cheer you up!

thumb_up thumb_down -17

A priest walks into a bakers and asks for a loaf of bread , the baker asks "white or brown" the priest replies "it does not matter Sir I have my bike outside".

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Chuck Norris goes to the mars to fight the marshuns he then die's soon after because there is lack of oxegen on mars and theres no marshuns.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

If strippers are exotic dancers then drug dealers are to exotic pharmacists.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What color was the fence before it was painted green? Not green.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How do you stop a black man from drowning Get your foot off of his head

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Q: What's big, yellow and can't swim? A: A school bus full of children.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you get a clown off a swing? Hit him with an ax.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops