a man in a black van pulls up to a kids house and offers him icecream the kid points out that since it is summer and black absorbs heat, that the icecream will have melted

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Whats worse than sour milk? 911. Whats worse than 911? drinking sout milk!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's worse than rape? Gang rape.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Yo mama so fat she has more chins than the Chinese phone book. A.V.T was here Fred.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

you and your family will die tonight

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Yo momma so fat, she has large amount of fat deposited in her body

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Your mom is like a tire iron: she's a whore

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the boy throw the clock out of the window? Because it was broken.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

9/11

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was playing Pokemon Go.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Hey, have you seen Steve Wonder's house? No. Neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright in the middle of the night and realized that his house was being robbed.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

This boy. We shall call him George. George was skating down the street when he passed the market. George stopped and looked in when he saw this SWEET pair of shoes! They were priced for 20 bucks. So George rushed home and went to his dad who was mowing the lawn. "DAD DAD!" "what?" The dad said. "I FOUND THESE SWEET PAIR OF SHOES! Can you lend me 20 bucks?" His dad shook his head and George ran inside the house and went up to his mom who was washing the dishes. "Mom can you lend me 20 bucks for these sweet shoes?" His mom just looked at him funny and said, "No". Angry, George set off upstairs to his sister's room who was on the computer. "Sis can you lend me...." "GET OUT OF MY ROOM!!" She slammed the door in his face. George sighed and went to his room. But before he got to his door, he saw a 20 dollar bill on the floor. He picked it up and rushed to the store. Once he got the shoes he ran back home to his dad. "Dad DAD! Look at these.." He stopped and saw his dad that was under the lawnmower dead. George shrugged and went inside to his mom. "Mom mom! Look at these...." He stopped and saw that his mom was stuffed in the dishwasher, dead. George sighed and ran upstairs to show his sis. "Hey sis look at...." She was found with her head in the computer screen, dead. So George sighed and walked down to the living room. He plumped on the couch and wondered about how his family died. Then there was a knock on the door. George hesitated. It knocked again. He got up and went to the door. Opened it and out stood a penguin. He stared at the penguin. "What do you want?!" The penguin stared back. What did he say?????? Nothing penguins can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

On a scale of Casey Anthony to Jerry Sandusky how much do you like kids?

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A man decided to commit suicide. He did.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's blue and can't sing? Blue.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a registered sex offender.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. It started raining and an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful time. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

One day a man named Tyler put a picture of an Asian in his wallet and proceeded to call himself Asian even though he was of Caucasian. Then a theif pick pocketed his wallet and was confused.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

So, a giraffe walks into a bar and orders six martinis and shame on for wanting a punch line this giraffe needs help.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's sad about four black people going over in a cliff in Cadillac? It was my Cadillac.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A termite walks into the pub and says "Is the bar tender here?"

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q: Why can't white people dunk? A: because they can't jump high enough

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the black guy buy watermelon? It was on sale.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops