A man walks into a bar, looks to the right and sees a man one foot tall playing the piano, he sits at the bar and says to the bar tender,"I'm feeling kind of down" the bar tender gives him a bottle of very strong alcohol and later that night he goes home and hangs himself.

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Whats, red, blue, green, yellow, feels like popcorn, looks like jello, tastes like hydrogen peroxide and smells like burning logs? i dont know. i was asking you

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What did the African want for breakfast? Ebola cereal

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1: Knock knock. 2: Who's there? 1: Boo. 2: Please do come on in Boo, its so lovely to see you!

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I hate it when I try to put my gun on safety but I accidentally shoot u a school full of kid.

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*ahem* what? what. oh I thought you said something

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Keanu Reaves

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Why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a pineapple

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What happens when a black guy roles over a speed-bump? I don't know. I have never tried it

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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There once was a man who had a penis that was so big, his girlfriend liked it a lot. A year later they got married and had kids, but then the man lost his accounting job and things went downhill.

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yo moma is so poor she cant afford free samples

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please dis this joke, I want to get to the bottom of the leaderboard!

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whats green at the bottom of a hole and covered in cookie crumbs a girl scout run over by a truck

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osama is obame quincadence or aluminatti????

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A woman walks into the kitchen to make a sandwich because she is hungry and she likes sandwiches.

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you lose.

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A dying man walked into a shop and started to look at the clothing on display. Then he died.

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why did katy fall off her bike?

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What is yellow and can shot? A Banon.

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have you seen Britney Spears lately? no. i wouldn't expect you to since she is a pop sensation and you are just a regular person trying to find your way in this world

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Q.What do you call a beaver with a unibrow. A. A beaver........it's still a beaver

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If you have 12 apples and 7 oranges in one hand, and 9 apples and 10 oranges in one hand, what do you have? Very large hands.

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Ask me if my name is Jennifer. Is your name Jennifer? No.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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